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Clank
10-20-2008, 17:51:50
Ok heres a new book from me, But this time it is completely a new story about heroes, villians, lies and lots of action. It will also be much much longer then my previous one, the phantoms.

At the end of each chapter i would be really grateful if you could post comments and ideas for the next chapter.

Please dont lie and be honest, give constructive criticism ;)
If you have any queries, feel free to ask.

The new story is called "Bullets".



WARNING- This book will definitely not be suitable for young readers.

Here is the link to the site you can view the story on, because it is not suitable for younger members ;)

http://bulletsstory.sosblog.com/index.htm

Clank
10-20-2008, 20:27:59
Will all people who have read the story please post the comments on this thread instead of posting them on the site the story is being posted on please ;)

http://bulletsstory.sosblog.com/index.htm

Direct link to chapter 1:
http://bulletsstory.sosblog.com/The-first-blog-b1/Chapter-1-b1-p2.htm

LovelyUndeadVam
10-21-2008, 23:39:19
just read the first chapter. it was really good. very descriptive. i should probably mention that you are spelling "realize" as "realise". ;) thought you should know. :) anyways. other than that, very well done on that one! :appl:

Mistery
10-22-2008, 00:41:36
Realize and realise are both correct :)
In British English both forms exist, while in American English only "realize" is used.

LovelyUndeadVam
10-22-2008, 00:44:21
:o! really? oh i didn't even know that! wow, i just learned something. :P it's good either way. :haha: i like it.

Clank
10-22-2008, 07:29:43
Thanks LovelyUndeadVam for the comments and Mistery for the correction.

Here it actually doesnt matter which way you spell it ;) but most use realise.. ;):o

Justeazy
01-29-2009, 04:36:38
Cool!
I liked it, it is kinda confusing...

but...

WHEN YOU GONNA ADD MORE?!?!

ShiningStar
01-29-2009, 15:38:59
nice story, can't wait to read more!:)

Clank
01-30-2009, 20:40:39
Thanks :) Well i think the site went down for about two weeks so i forgot about it, i already wrote two chapters but i forgot, so they will be up very
shortly ;)

Ok direct link to chapter 2
http://bulletsstory.sosblog.com/The-first-blog-b1.htm

Justeazy
01-31-2009, 02:46:35
a gh-WHAT?!?

Also, was that last part (a knife in the back) a metaphor or a description?

Clank
01-31-2009, 15:15:10
Ok :D Well basically i am dead :P

elle
02-02-2009, 23:41:43
Hi Clank :)

Read through your first two chapters. The were well written and did hold the reader's attention. Nice work. Now waiting for chapter 3 :)

LovelyUndeadVam
02-03-2009, 00:12:18
omg. OMGOMGOMG. :D You gotta hurry with the next chapter! :S I can't wait to read it!

ShiningStar
02-03-2009, 16:46:38
Can't wait for more chapters!:D

Clank
02-03-2009, 17:21:39
Thanks for the comments, one coming up tomorrow :) keep checking ;)

Emo234
02-04-2009, 03:58:13
Ok the first chapter was very good I like it so far.I already like it alot cuz it's a love story from what I get.(yay)




Edit:

Ok so chapter 2 was very good too.I like it alot.U really have me hooked.Ur going on my fav writer list I like ur style clank :hug2: U have a good talent and a brilliant mind.


I got a lil confused about the knife tho where was it,in his back,her back,or the ground?????

Clank
02-04-2009, 16:31:56
The knife is in the haracters back and the character is now dead. :)

And i will switch the writing to third person :) And also it is a love, story, thriller :D